What We’re Reading: Unreasonable Hospitality

From the first page to the last, Unreasonable Hospitality, by Will Guidara, is a delightful read.

And that is saying something because nearly every business book ever published is nothing more than a great post on X dressed up as a blog post which is pretending to be a book.

Unreasonable Hospitality, however, is much more than just a spunky tweet masquerading as a book.

Guidara writes, "we are in the middle of a digital transformation. That transformation has enhanced many aspects of our lives, but too many companies have left the human behind. They've been so focused on products, they've forgotten about people. And while it may be impossible to quantify in financial  terms the impact of making someone feel good, don't think for a second that it doesn't matter. In fact, it matters more." 

So much of what is considered unreasonable in "unreasonable hospitality" is because it doesn't scale or because it's not an efficient use of capital, human, or otherwise. 

But I think that’s kind of the point.

When I think back on things that have brought me the most delight in life, almost all of them are things (places, experiences, moments) that, by their very design, cannot scale.

One specific story comes to mind.

First, for several years, Mel and I have been hosting a series of small dinner parties. We call them intentional gatherings with the goal of creating spaces that cultivate deeper connection in our community. 

I plan, prep, and cook the 5-course meal. And then, after plating and serving them to our friends, I talk about the inspiration for that dish—from the vendor at the Alemany Farmer’s Market that I purchased blackberries from to the frustrating failures in my efforts to perfect it. The intimacy of that moment required inefficiency (of my time, of my imperfect efforts, of my knowledge of my friends and guests). 

The intentionality and proximity (over many months) of these meals with the same group of people produced a depth of conversation that was uniquely special.

So much of what is considered unreasonable in "unreasonable hospitality" is because it doesn't scale or because it's not an efficient use of capital, human or otherwise. 

But it doesn't scale. I have no intention of launching a restaurant. Not only am I not skilled enough, but more importantly, I am unwilling to endure the kind of suffering running a successful restaurant demands. 

Beyond my silly excuse for not starting a restaurant, there is a bigger reason at play. These moments were tied to a specific place and time. They are, by the very definition of their existence, unique. They are 1 of 1.   

But in our effort to be successful in the game of life—as defined most often by either power or money (is there really a difference?)—we sacrifice these magical moments on the altar of efficiency. The altar of scale.

I wonder... would building small and beautiful enterprises that were purpose-built to NOT scale, create something that is otherwise not possible at scale? Something more beautiful perhaps? Something more impactful to specific individuals? Something more specifically integrated into a place instead of a broadly-appealing milquetoast substitute?

Do you ever wonder what extraordinary and unreasonably delightful creations might burst forth within these constraints? Could we imagine a reality where small is truly beautiful?

“Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius — and a lot of courage — to move in the opposite direction.” —E.F. Schumacher, Small is Beautiful